Saturday, 28 September 2013

Labour's Rocky Horror Show

As the Labour Party took it's "jump to the left" this week, we saw firsthand how "madness takes its toll."

Things turned ugly when the faithful realised there'll be no pot of gold at the end of the 2015 campaign rainbow - brutal medicine for a party infamously free with the public purse. So the furious mob turned its sights on the private sector, just like in the bad old days.

Gordo's lieutenants did their best not to disappoint the baying crowd, smashing in a few shop windows in an effort to claw back some of the profits they'd gleefully handed out when their old boss proclaimed the end of boom and bust. But the private equity boys are a vicious crew, and they were waiting. They went after those dogmatic party geeks like a bunch of Paras on PCP, strangely trailed by Lord Mandelson waving a socket wrench.

The geeks took a hiding, but they weren't giving up, or venting their sterile rage on public sector waste. Or gnashing their teeth about the six ways 'the System' is in a worse state than in 2008. No way. Back in the safety of the Hilton Metropole they were hell-bent on re-nationalising everything this country's sold off in its vain attempt to keep kicking the economic can down the road: "railways, power, water, Royal Mail." Savagely yearning for the return of British Leyland. A time when the State could do no wrong and Jimmy Savile ruled the BBC.

As the great Gonzo once said, "when the going gets weird, the weird turn pro."

Doomed, you might think. And so too is the old Labour rort of hiring public sector employees so they can automatically join the unions and unwittingly subsidise the party's lust for power. Snubbed by these ingrates, Milibore now wants to slip his hand into the public purse to fund his dreams, and is tempting the other parties to follow suit. He might be onto something there. Party political types are united in greed, if nothing else. But the Tories know there'll be nothing left by 2015 anyway. Soon they'll be sewing patches on the elbows of their suits...

You'd think that should mean a blissfully quiet election. But based on this week's performance I reckon Labour's rocky horror show has only just begun.

We're in for a mind flip.

We'll be into a time slip.

Labour will do the Time Warp again.

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